Friday, December 22, 2017

My new coat...and the minister at the nursing home.

My new coat finally arrived, and at last I was able to get a picture...coincidentally just before the day when I got to take a picture of the outfit I wore to answer the door (see earlier post.)   So why not take pictures of them both?  After all, girls wear coats over their dresses!

So, above is the result: a coat which fully passes muster with my wife, and fits properly, over a dress which I regularly wear around the house.  Absolutely a win-win situation!

When I went to visit Mother last Sunday, I found that the staff had wheeled her to the on-site holiday church service.   She was asleep in her wheelchair when I arrived, and much to the amusement of some of the ladies there, did not wake up when I sat down next to her.  After a few minutes I gently shook her arm, and she woke up.  The ladies loved the astonished look on her face when she saw me.

After the service was over, I wheeled her back to her room, and a short visit later, it was time to leave.  We said our farewells, and I headed down the hall.  I sensed a man walking behind me but catching up, and I heard "Oh Ma'am?"  and again, "Ma'am, were you sitting with your mother?"  OMG - it was the minister, talking to me!

Of course I responded that I was, and he told me how nice she is... I agreed, and then he said she has been at a number of his services.   I told him that it's likely he will see her again!  As we parted, he said "Merry Christmas, Ma'am."  "Merry Christmas to you and yours as well, Reverend."  And I walked on, smiling, loving that my presentation (stirrup pants, tights, a turtleneck and clogs, with purse) was actually sufficient to be accepted as a woman by the minister.

But my day wasn't done yet.  Next stop was the pharmacy, to pick up some things.  The clerk didn't know me, but chose to leave off any gender-specific forms of address.  That's fine with me.  And at the grocery store, I was "Ma'am" to two young  (20-something) female clerks.  Then at the hardware store, my cover was blown...the clerks know I'm not what I seem to be.  :-(    But at the post office, a gentleman held the door for me greeted me with "Merry Christmas, Ma'am."

You win some, you lose some!



  1. It surely seems like more of the people you encounter opt for the female identification rather than male or even non-specific. Your female cues of the long hair, purse, tights/pantyhose, jewelry, stirrup pants and flats, now accompanied by the ladies coat surely give them enough feminine cues to feel comfortable with that option.
    BTW, I recall that at one point you 'inherited' a supply of stirrup pants from your mother. Stirrup pants were truly a woman's option years ago but I do not think I have seen them for sale or being worn about much in recent decades. Do you have a source for new stirrup pants or are all of the ones in your wardrobe hand me downs?

    1. Pst,

      There are days when it is better than others...but that's to be expected. The new coat does seem to help with the feminine image, though!

      You are correct that I inherited some stirrup pants from Mom. I remember when she wore them...and now I wear them! Don't we all love hand-me-downs?!

      However I had some of my own as well. Some were bought at a NY & CO store back few years ago. Others have come from Blair in Warren, PA - and amazingly, the last time I looked (a month or two ago), they still stock them! Women (genetic or trans) apparently wear enough of them to keep them in stock!


    2. Pat,

      See, I really do know how to spell your name. Guess I should get these nails cut down a bit. Tough to type accurately with long nails!

      Sorry about the typo!