A couple of weeks ago, I spoke on the
phone with an old acquaintance, who shares an affinity for the same
"pastime" which I (and many of us who blog here) do. Hadn't thought of
him much lately...till his call. A little
history:
The time frame is a bit hazy - best estimate is nearly 3 years ago. Both of
us worked for different employers, but knew each other casually through our jobs. We were at a
work-related meeting in our facility, and our common interest came to light
quite by accident. He'd been to a Halloween party several days before,
and was commenting to a few of us about it, in VERY, VERY bland
and generic terms. Others missed (or ignored) his "hints," but my ears perked right up.
Subsequently, from his raised eyebrows at my own brief comment (to
nobody in particular), that I had my very own sartorial
style, the "light went on" for both of us.
The
meeting concluded at quitting time, and my acquaintance walked to my
office with me, while I shut down my computer and put things away for
the night.
Once we were alone, he asked if I was "wearing nail enhancements, women's shoes and a
women's suit?" How could I answer with anything but "yes" - he'd
obviously noticed my shiny acrylic nails, and the fact that my suit coat
buttoned the "wrong" way. He told me that he noticed my skimmers when my pantleg moved up as we climbed the stairs, while I was leading the way!
From my archives, here's a picture of how I was dressed that day (minus the lipstick and silver nails, of course):
Very "suitable" for work...notice how invisible my skimmers were, until that pant leg came up.
"Outing
myself" to him opened the door for reciprocation. He began to reveal
details about his dressing. He gave me some snapshots, in which he was
well dressed, recognizable up close but looking very feminine. We
talked
freely about our dressing, our clothes, and needless to say, lingered
for a while, gabbing like a couple of schoolgirls.
From
that point on, we spoke by phone every couple months, and enjoyed
lunch together in Washington, DC, whenever our
schedules coincided - he in drab, and me in my progressively more androgynous clothes...
Since
he's still too young to retire, he remains "in the
closet" as far as his employer is concerned - a male-dominated
occupation. They aren't as liberal as
they could be. He still gets "out and about" several times each year,
though his girlfriend is not particularly supportive. If you've been following my
blog, you already know my own situation...so I won't repeat myself
here.
Once I retired, unfortunately our lunches became much tougher to
work out....though we've agreed to try to get together at some point
"down the road," possibly even to dress. Time will tell how much we can do...
Cheers,
Mandy
Being able to blog and discuss our dressing on line is wonderful but having a friend with similar proclivities is truly special. What many of us crave is an affirmation that we are not alone and that our desires to wear clothes and to present in a style that is typically reserved for the female gender is not wrong.
ReplyDeleteYou should be pleased that he has reached out to you to keep the friendship alive.
Pat
Oops I did it wrong again...
DeleteSee my response below!
Hi PAT,
ReplyDeleteIt was wonderful to talk with him again. We certainly have many things in common.
He doesn't get "out and about" much...perhaps even less often than even me - if that's possible! So it will be a miracle if we can make a girls' night out work at some point!
But once again it proves, as you have said, that we are definitely not alone.
Mandy