So the better half and I married in the early '80's, with one child. Life was good...though there were some hectic times, a voluntary job change and a move to New York. I became involved with contract work, and times stayed good for a while.
Then in the very early 90's I ended up out of work through no fault of my own, with little money. Stress personified. Unemployment insurance was helping pay the bills, but I still had to find work. So, for many weeks, I was on the road looking for work, and that left me with evenings on my own.
I recall it well...one evening, after no lunch and a skimpy dinner, and after hearing "don't call us, we'll call you if we want you" at least six times, I was drawn to a Sears store in the Binghamton, NY mall. I went inside, and for some reason my legs carried me into the women's department. I still can't explain exactly why... There I found a friendly, older sales lady to help me find something "for my wife, who is my size." I'm sure she saw right through my words, but she wanted the sale, played along, and when I left, I had a dress, slip, bra and small purse in a shopping bag. In addition, she helped me get a pair of women's shoes, too, "for my wife." But, in reality, for my "softer side."
The next day, I was still in Binghamton, and finished applying at a company, when I noticed the beauty salon down the street. How I ever found the courage to walk in and ask if they could do some makeup for me, for a "party," I still don't know - but I ended up with an appointment for the next afternoon. "Don't forget to wear your girl clothes, though - you're going to look more like a girl when you leave!"
So the next morning absolutely flew by. I had to take the afternoon off the job search, changed clothes and ventured outside for my makeup application. There was no choice but to walk in as a "guy in a dress." The customers in the shop stared at first, but that stopped when they saw the girls and I were having fun with it. And the girls found me an inexpensive wig too, so I looked "sort of" presentable when I left. (Unfortunately there are no pictures - digital wasn't around then, and I didn't have disposable funds to buy film for my camera.)
I drove around after my appointment (getting my first experience driving a manual transmission while wearing a dress), went into a few stores. and recall getting more double-takes and strange looks than I care to think about...far more than I get today. But my heart was pounding and I remember enjoying it all. After the rush...came relaxation...turns out wearing dresses was a great stress reliever.
Whenever financial stresses built up while I was at back at home between job hunting trips, I experimented with the better half's things. She was a substitute teacher part-time...unexpected early quits caused a couple of "busts," when she found me wearing her clothes. I got all the usual questions about "do you like men?" etc. To which I could honestly say "no, only women." But instead of giving up cross dressing, I just took my old wardrobe to the attic, timed things better, and "getting caught" ceased.
That was the same time frame when I had to be out in the cold New York State winters. She got me into pantyhose and tights for warmth. And she was OK with my wearing them whenever I wanted. I don't honestly remember how I got into panties - I think it was abrasions from the tighty-whities I used to wear, and panties were soothing. But in any case, those also started to populate my underwear drawer, with no issues.
Once the job situation settled down, we settled near Washington DC, with pantyhose and panties now a part of my everyday wardrobe. Androgynous or indistinguishable women's things kept finding their way into my closet, and there were no issues or complaints from the better half. Stirrup pants became much more plentiful during this time frame, as well. Originally bought for winter wear, they just sort of took on a life of their own and I found myself wearing them more and more often - much softer and more comfortable than menswear. I got a bunch of summerweight stirrups, and subsequently they became my primary casual pants. I started to grow my nails longer than a typical male's in the mid to late 90's, and for a time, did my own gel manicures (complete with the grinding tool and UV light) with instructions from a sympathetic beautician.
In about 2002, I began venturing out and about again, because I met a crossdresser with an accepting wife at an antique car show. (If you have read prior blogs, you know I have an antique car). Can't recall exactly how we got on the topic - wish I could - it would be interesting to remember! After communicating by email, a few weeks later he and his wife met me at another car show. In their hotel room that afternoon, they helped me to actually begin to look like a completely confident woman for the first time. (Fortunately I did find a pic of that!)
It felt absolutely glorious - better than ever before! He (in male mode) took me by the hand, and together we walked through the hotel and around the car show...I was in heaven! That get-together actually took a fair amount of courage and trust on my part...once they had me fastened into a corset and slip, pantyhose on, with the dress zipped up (I couldn't reach it myself), wig and breast forms on, platform sandals strapped on, and full makeup applied, with my male clothes, keys and wallet locked int their room upstairs, they could have abandoned me in the parking lot, gotten in their car and gone to dinner and a movie - and I'd have been in really deep doo-doo! But it worked out perfectly.
For a while, this was an arrangement made in heaven... I drove to quite a few car shows in his home town over a three year period (an 8 hour drive one-way) to be able to dress and go out after the show and the following day. And that's where in 2004, we had our professional makeovers done together - strangely enough, arranged by his daughter, who knew the owner of the shop!
It was an absolutely fabulous evening - from about 6:30 to 10:30 PM... Expensive, but fabulous! I still have the pictures...the one above is a sample. Some have been reduced to digital format for posterity, and I think they truly portray me in a good light. It was something I someday hope to do again! All of my visits to Kath's place were wonderful experiences which I will never forget, and her family was very understanding and helpful! My experiences cross dressing there are something that the better half still does not know about to this day.
A year or so later, Kath lost interest, and gave up dressing. But I didn't!
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