Recently I had occasion to visit my Primary Care Physician.
This wasn't an issue for the provider. He knows my birth gender, and uses appropriate greetings and pronouns when necessary. The fact that I typically look more like a girl than a boy doesn't seem to be a problem.
The staff, however, no longer knows me. I found that out today. There has been an almost complete turnover in support employees since last fall. When I checked in, I noticed female staffers (all new since my last
visit) omitted any gender specific greetings, and the same thing
happened when I was called to go into the exam room. For those who may be interested, my outfit was tan stirrup pants over black trouser socks (no tights), a long black turtleneck tunic (un-tucked), nylon panties, and my flats. In addition, of course, to my purse, long nails and hair. Like so:
The nurse who initially took my blood pressure omitted any gender specific greetings...but when she came back in at the end of my visit to dispense a pneumonia vaccination, she reminded me to "take your tunic off so I can reach the top of your arm." I never did figure out if she had checked the records for my gender, but she didn't express surprise that I was bra-less.
Segue to the Nursing Home: recently I was told that by my mother's nursing home staff that the doctor discovered a small lump on one of my mother's breasts, and they reminded me that I should begin to have a breast exam each year, since it tends to run in families. (Yes, they know my birth gender.)
Back to my Primary Care visit: my provider didn't flinch when I asked him to do it, particularly because of the size of my breasts (I've never been measured, but they are more noticeable when I wear certain tops. Not typical male breasts.) He thought it was a good idea and will check them again in the future. Fortunately, nothing needing further investigation was found.
When my visit was over, I went to the check out desk, where the twentysomething clerk got a full view of my appearance as I approached. I inquired about paperwork for a couple of non-invasive tests the doctor suggested. The clerk (new staff) had to call across the office to the doctor's nurse and inquire about "Ms. Sherman's referral." I heard her say to the nurse: "Yes, she inquired about them." (I was referred to as "she" a number of times.) Then she asked: "Ma'am, is it OK if we mail them? The printer is having issues." I told her that would be fine, and said "Have a wonderful day, Miss." She responded "You too, Ma'am.
Though my presentation initially seemed as though it may have been marginal, the visit turned out to be wonderful!